January 27: Chocolate Cake Day
I’m all about home-baked, but sometimes you need to embrace modern conveniences and go to Trader Joe’s a buy a mini chocolate bundt cake.
Was it as good as homemade? No, (it actually tasted like a Hostess Cupcake?), but that’s okay sometimes.
Tomorrow: National Blueberry Pancake Day
January 10: Bittersweet Chocolate Day
When it comes to chocolate, give me milk or give me death. What’s up with all these fancy candy bars that boast higher and higher cocoa percentages? Why would I spend $7 on a candy bar that tastes like a $2 bar of Baker’s baking chocolate (gross), when I could spend $0.80 on a Hershey’s bar? Hmph.
I tried to make today ~fun~. If I have to eat bittersweet chocolate (WHY, GOD, WHY?), I might as well eat BBQ potato chip bittersweet chocolate, right?
Wrong.
Not tasty. Not good. Not Hershey’s. Hershey’s > “American Farms & Artisans”.
Tomorrrow: Milk Day
January 5: National Whipped Cream Day
Best kept secret at Starbucks: Kid’s hot chocolate. It’s like, $1.40. #winning.
Tomorrow: National Shortbread Day
January 3: Chocolate Covered Cherry Day
Oh my. I’m so, SO far behind in updating. It’s February 23! I’m stuck in the beginning of January! I need to power through! I’ve eaten everything, I just need to post about my experiences! I might post minimal text (though I love to blab…) just to get the posts up and finally get caught up. I don’t know. We will see.
Anyway! January 3 was chocolate covered cherry day. I’m sure that *fancy* chocolate covered cherries are good. Chocolate covered cherries from Walgreens are not. They tasted very chemical-y. Shocking, right?
The chocolate and the goo were actually okay tasting, it was the “cherry” (jk, I think it really is a cherry, no air quotes needed) that tasted like Pine-Sol or whatever. I contemplated eating the chocolate parts and spitting out the cherries, but ultimately decided that was stupid and just through the rest away. $2.99* down the drain.
Tomorrow: National Spaghetti Day
*Big spender
December 28: National Chocolate Candy Day
I wasn’t sure if “chocolate candy” meant candy with chocolate in it (like a candy bar) or an olde tyme-y chocolate candy. I went with the latter and got a turtle.
Tomorrow: Pepper Pot Day
December 16: National Chocolate Covered Anything Day!
This day pretty much fell into my lap. My coworker, Dylan, had a Snickers bar he didn’t want (WHAT!?) and he gave it to me. Guess what’s covered in chocolate? Snickers. Guess what’s an anything? Snickers.
Boom.
Tomorrow: National Maple Syrup Day
December 8: National Chocolate Brownie Day
Maybe this is a dumb question… but aren’t all brownies chocolate? Isn’t that why they’re called brownies? What is a brownie that doesn’t have chocolate? A blondie? But that’s a blondie, not a brownie.
Whatever.
I was super pumped that my friend Natalie decided to have a last minute birthday party for herself on National Chocolate Brownie Day! It gave me somewhere to bring them! 
Thanks for being born, Natalie!!
Tomorrow: National Pastry Day
November 30: National Mousse Day!
What exactly is a mousse? If I wasn’t IN A CHAIR FLYING THROUGH THE AIR RIGHT NOW without an internet connection, I would do that thing where I consult Wikipedia and it would tell me that a mousse is… a whipped and airy dessert that contains eggs and isn’t cooked… ? I just made that up, but that’s what I think a mousse is.
Going with my definition, I think French Silk Pie qualifies as a mousse. It’s chocolatey, fluffy, whipped for what seems like forever (okay, like, 25 minutes) and has eggs in it that aren’t cooked. That, my friends, is what a mousse is to me.
I was lucky since I made French Silk Pie for Thanksgiving. In fact, I made two just to ensure that I’d have a piece left for National Mousse Day. I supposed I could have always just put some mousse in my hair and called it a day… but I’d rather have the pie.
Tomorrow: National Pie Day.
November 7: Bittersweet Chocolate with Almonds Day!
Bittersweet Chocolate with Almonds Day is ALSO Bryce’s birthday! This is quite an appropriate pairing since Bryce loves dark chocolate. Like, the darkest chocolate available. I think it would be more cost effective for him to buy a block of baker’s chocolate instead of some fancy artisanal chocolate. Anyway! I couldn’t find any chocolate labeled “bittersweet chocolate with almonds”… it was either “bittersweet chocolate” or “dark chocolate with almonds”. I thought about buying the bittersweet chocolate and simultaneously chewing it with a few almonds, but decided to just buy the darkest chocolate with almonds available. That happened to be the INTENSE DARK.
Have you ever been to a SEA SALT SOIREE? It’s intense. You might even say intense dark. Speaking of SEA SALT SOIREES… who names chocolate bars? Are they the same people as the ones who name nail polish colors? I want that job.
Tomorrow: National Harvey Wallbanger Day.
October 28: National Chocolate Day!
I’m not one of those womenfolk who goes super nutso over chocolate. Do I like chocolate? You betcha! Do I like chocolate as much as a Cathy comic would make you believe? No. But no one really does, right? Are there ladies out there who like, would shank someone for a Hershey bar? No, right? I mean, yeah, I’m gonna eat chocolate if it’s there (because I’m not an idiot), but this whole FEMALES LOVE THEIR CHOCOLATE. AND THEIR WINE. AND THEIR CATS. AND OMG THEY BLEED FOR DAYS AND DON’T DIE is tired and old and annoying and I sort of hate it.
That said! I do enjoy a candy bar. And turtles (the chocolate covered nuts kind, not the creatures that carry salmonella). And pudding. And chocolate cake (with non-chocolate frosting). And ice cream. But I feel that this is a UNIVERSAL thing and not an ovaries thing.
Anyway, I hope everyone is enjoying the plethora of FUN SIZED candies that are inundating our lives right now. Did you know that in order to be called FUN SIZE they need to contain zero calories? Cool, right?
Tomorrow: National Oatmeal Day
