January 16: National Fig Newton Day
It’s such a bummer that this isn’t just “newton” day. I thoroughly enjoy an apple newton. It’s like a mini little pie! A package is rows of miniature apple pies, just for you!
But fig newtons are gross. Their seeds are crunchy and it makes me think I’m eating bugs. Not that I’m opposed to eating bugs, it’s just I’d like them to be up front about it and not hide little crunchy bugs in fig goo.
Tomorrow: Hot Buttered Rum Day